Editorials

13 Bands & Musicians That You Totally P*ssed Off When You Elected Trump

As the world continues to bleakly barrel through the wildfire-like spread of the utter disease that is President-Elect Trump’s appointed officials, we’ve compiled a list of 13 of the innumerable bands and musicians that you’ve either majorly disappointed or downright p*ssed off.  

3 weeks ago, an overwhelming amount of white Americans (albeit, a significant amount of them of either impoverished, of a lower income tax bracket, rural, or some combination thereof) decided to put their faith and their vote to an orange-colored multi-millionaire, thinking that somehow this born-into-artisocracy-man- who never once shelled out any true amount of charity with his tiny hands- would somehow muster some unforseen compassion and help “take back America” through a platform sustained on xenophobia, islamophobia, racism, and a slew of other hate-based backwards thinking to dodge the real questions about economic policy (or any policy, really) to the tune of massive support from Neo-Nazis, fascists, and the KKK.

And if that already didn’t send off a series of screaming warning bells, whistles, sirens, and a MILLION red flags, Donald Trump and Mike Pence’s selected appointees are surely the wedding bells of the marriage of humanity and impending disaster. But, hey, don’t take my word for it- just check out proposed head of EPA Myron Ebell (an avid climate change denier, rejecter of science, and arguably the saddest pile of soft fleshy goo to have ever graced the face of this planet); proposed Secretary of Housing and Urban Development Ben Carson (a neurosurgeon who’s likely undergone a recent lobotomy, given that he rejected the offer, stating that he does not want to work in government, which further suggests his denial that he ever ran for President this past election); his most-recent proposed Secretary of Treasury Steven Mnuchin (a former Goldman Sachs executive whois deeply rooted in Hollywood and has absolutely no government experience whatsoever- but, hey, it’s all a learning curve, right?); and countless other disastrous picks.

Oh, yeah, he’s reaaaallly taking it back, alright- back to 1920s pre-market crash, save that this time around we can expect a greater and faster route of environmental devastation (sorry, kids, but you’re gonna lose bananas, coffee, and, like a significant amount of marine life // what’s a whale anyways? Betsy DeVos won’t tell me).

But, somehow, despite all sense of fact and reasoning, some of you (though, not all of you- we see you people who realize what an epic mistake clusterf*ck that a certain percentage of the nation made) still insist that the concept of an American Dream  is achievable and will reign supreme, even though an alarming amount of you (and your other fellow Americans) are put at an extreme risk in all of this. So, if hard fact and reputable reporting is just too much for you all to bear and you can’t seem to understand why you should all be ashamed (despite the fact that even friggin’ Ireland is appalled– IRELAND, guys. Come on), or at least a little remorseful for your, erm… silly (we have other choice words, but they won’t make the cut) egregiously misinformed voting decisions (and that includes the moronic half of the nation’s registered voters that DIDN’T CAST THEIR BALLOTS), this one’s for you.

As the world continues to bleakly barrel through the wildfire-like spread of the utter disease that is President-Elect Trump’s appointed officials, we’ve compiled a list of 13 of the innumerable bands and musicians that you’ve either majorly disappointed or downright p*ssed off.

1. Propaghandi

propaghandi

 

Are you really surprised? Fuck, man, these are the guys that brought you that hit single, “The Only Good Fascist Is A Very Dead Fascist.” Probability that these Canucks are floored that we elected a multi-millionaire xenophobic fascist? 100%. Probability that they’re gonna feel compelled to make a new album out of it all? Well, wouldn’t you like that? $5 says they’ll do it and your tiny mind won’t be able to tell the obvious message(s) even if they sat down and shit right in front of you.

2. Sara Bareilles

sb2

Please, a blind man could see this from a mile away- of course Sara Barielles is utterly dismayed and embittered by your voting actions. NPR’s This American Life commissioned the popular singer/songwriter to write “Seriously,” a take on the internal monologue of President Obama as he prepares to see an uncomfortable amount of Americans vote for Donald Trump (+utilizing singers Neil Patrick Harris, Leslie Odom, Jr., and John Ellison Conlee, as well as a fantastic orchestra). She also publicly endorsed Hillary Clinton. So, of course she’s p*ssed and you can BET that she’ll never write you another “Love Song.”

SB1.jpg

 

Oh, and she’s got her new musical, Waitress, on Broadway. $5 bets that Pence will make the sorry mistake of attending THIS one, too, and somehow expect to not be booed by his fellow audience members and gently addressed by the actors with an honest plea for sane, peaceful governing, only to ignore their heeds and later beg Donald for a “safe space.”

Oh, I’m sorry, did that trigger you? Why don’t you go rant about it on Twitter and make baseless, false claims about how theatre and journalism were never means of political expression and how you’re “disappointed to see politics intercept journalism”- see how far that’ll getcha.

3. Sum-41

Sum 41 London Kentish Town Forum Kerrang tour review, photos, setlist
Photo by Chris Chadwick

While on Warped Tour this summer, Sum-41 made it a point to send a big ol’ middle finger salute with the crowd to Donald Trump. So, yeah, to say they’re p*ssed is an understatement. I hope every time they come on Sirius XM Octane, you change the channel out of a combination of embarassment and gut-wrenching guilt.

(You can catch some stellar Donald Trump references in here, provided you have two ears and have temporarily relinquished your butt-hurt closed-mindedness).

4. In Hearts Wake

ihw

Also while on this year’s Warped Tour bill, In Hearts Wake took a moment to note that we have an “interesting election” coming up and we had better make the right choice, as our decisions will impact others for years to come. For those of you just starting to crawl out of the shoebox, IHW is an Australian metalcore band that thematically writes about environmentalism and other social issues: throughout their Earthwalker campaign, they planted 1,379 trees and revitalized a small patch of forest in the process; donating the proceeds of Skydancer to three grass-roots non-profit organizations (Seventh Generation Fund For Indigenous Peoples in North America, Germany’s Hardcore Help that focuses on Africa, and Australia’s Red Dust).

Suffice it to say, they abhor Donald Trump and Mike Pence (and their appointees thus far) and are probably more than bitterly disappointed in you, especially since now they’ll probably feel like they have to pick up the slack that you lazy, greedy, xenophobic, fascist, faux-democratic American individuals have heaped into their laps.

Seriously, though, the members of In Hearts Wake are such wonderful dudes who just want to help save the friggin’ world- how could you?!?

Don’t be surprised if they/I throw a cave spider at your face and unleash a literally angry mob of murderous kangaroos on your sorry butt- you deserve it. You really let these wonderful Aussies down.

5. Frank Turner

frankturner

Not too long ago, I had the immense pleasure incredible, life-changing experience of seeing Frank Turner and The Sleeping Souls live at The Haunt in Ithaca, NY. During his performance, on his almighty pedestal of Punk, he noted that we have a tough election coming up, but that we’re “going to figure it out.” Which, of course, was a pretty clearly coded message for, “FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING, GET OUT THERE AND VOTE FOR SOMEONE OTHER THAN THAT TINY-HANDED AMBULATORY ROTTEN CARROT.”

Now, could you argue that maybe he was referring to Clinton as well? Possibly, but considering that that sentiment came from the man who wrote, “Thatcher Fucked the Kids,” I think it’s safe to say that he really despised Trump.

The point is that Frank Turner believed in us- and you lot let him down. Congratulations, you basically pissed off the cool punk uncle of us all. I can’t wait to stare you down over Christmas dinner.

And then, as our numbered days tick down, I’m gonna blare all of his planned upcoming music until you develop Tinnitus.

6. Moby

moby5

We could reference an awful lot of things, from Moby’s staunch activism, to his frequent expression of ideals on social media, to the release of two anti-Trump songs (“Trump Is On Your Side” & “Little Failure,”) to this interview with Rolling Stone where he stated,

“I think there is something seriously broken inside him where he’s an actual sociopath and on the spectrum pretty close to being a psychopath. He’s done nothing to indicate that he’s even capable of feeling empathy [for anyone] except for himself.”

But we figured we’d let the pictures do the talking instead…

Moby4.jpgmoby3Moby2.jpgmoby1

(If you don’t feel embarassed yet, then try hitting yourself over the head repeatedly with a few dozen history books- let the crushing weight of their information seep into your brain via osmosis so you can at least recognize what a right fool you are.)

7. Young Jeezy

jeezy

Considering that this is the man who unleashed on our ears the powerful “My President,” you best not even second guess that Jeezy wasn’t anywhere NEAR the Donald Trump Train of Systematic Slippery Slanderous Statements and his cute little neo-fascist, poser-American posse of appointees. But if you really don’t believe me (which would be ridiculous at this point), how about you try on his interview with Rap-Up for size:

“…I definitely wouldn’t be voting for Donald Trump,” he said, before adding that he doesn’t feel the Republican candidate is fit for leadership.

Oh, and don’t forget that he has a daughter to raise in these now terrible, tumultuous, divided times, thanks to your voting trends. Yeah, y’all definitely did a number on yourselves this time around. Way to piss off Jeezy- see you on the other side after he nails your asses with the 808. #byegirl

 

8. YG & Nipsey Hussle

yg

Speaking of getting completely annihilated, you best BELIEVE that from YG & Nipsey Hussle will destroy you while on the #FuckDonaldTrumpTour. They weren’t afraid to come right out and denounce Trump in their track “FDT,” and they sure as Hell aren’t afraid to come after your deplorable-desicion-making derriers either.

yg2

9. Father John Misty

fjm3
Same here, dude.

This is the man who took his set-time during WXPN’s XPoNential Music Festival in Camden, NJ to deliver to the ears of Americans a much-needed lecture:

“I always thought that it was going to look way more sophisticated than this when evil happened. When the collective consciousness was so numb and so fucking sated and so gorged on entertainment. … How entertaining should this be right now with a fucking battleship in the background and this shit on TV, how fucking fun should this be? How fucking fun can it be? Can it be real in any sense? Like, I cannot play ‘Bored in the USA’ for you right now. No no no, because guess what? I soft-shoed that shit into existence by going, ‘No no no, look over here, it’ll never actually be that bad because we’re too smart.’ And while we were looking in that direction, stupidity just fucking runs the world because entertainment is stupid! Do you guys realize that?”

 

So, yeah, we can mark him down for a staunch Anti-Trump sort of guy. Oh, and he isn’t too terribly fond of some of Trumps appointees either (and he DEFINITELY isn’t afraid to call them what they are):

fjm2

 

 

And if that wasn’t compelling enough, here’s his cover of Tim Heidecker’s “Trumps Private Pilot.”

**Bonus Round: Feel like fighting him on social media? Mmmm…  Bad idea (or, conversely, good idea- I can watch that sh*tstorm unravel instead of writing these articles)- he’ll outwit you quicker & worse than a linguist during Scrabble (you’re not going to win. Ever.)

fjm_li

10. WAVVES

wavves

Earlier this year, WAVVES frontman Nathan Williams made an open list of everyone that they’d rather not have at (i.e., ban from) their shows, including but not limited to: Trump supporters, #AllLivesMatter defenders, racists, homophobes… Basically all of the deplorable, bigoted folk who do nothing but sling around hate speech and Fox (or should we say, “Faux”) News headlines from dawn til dusk. Y’know, like, a solid percentage of the voting population in the American midwest.

This doesn’t mean that Williams is opposed to a matter of a “difference of opinion(s),” but the singer did clarify that:

“In light of the constant rape, murder, homophobia, racism and misogyny that goes on seemingly everyday, I feel the need to make clear who I personally make music for and who I don’t.” “Nobody’s perfect (including myself)… [but]…I’d rather have a room half-filled with good energy than one filled with hate.”

I’d sooner recommend standing outside during a tornado than ever running into these guys because they are undoubtedly PISSED OFF and most likely out for blood at this point.**

**As far as I know, they have yet to ban people who- for the most ludicrous reasons- couldn’t be bothered to cast a vote despite the fact that we fought literal wars to have and maintain such a basic democratic right. Good news to the projected 41.6 % of the nation’s registered voters that somehow believed that their vote “doesn’t count”– you can still attend their shows (though, to err on the side of caution, I wouldn’t openly mention it ever, mostly because you deserve to be hit upside the head with Stephen Pope’s Epiphone Flying-V bass+).

+If you didn’t like hearing the fact that I just called out all >60 million of you for helping enable this incipient monstrosity by standing still when the Republic needed you most, you can just forget about everything I said and listen to the nice song that I embedded below while you blow off some steam.

11. Green Day

green-day

I’m sorry, was one Rock Opera tailored to the abhorrent state of American politics and crippling economic structures just not enough for you? Did you need one more? Really? Oh, and let me guess, you also want another Broadway production of said impending Rock Opera?

May I kindly remind you that these men have families and every second they spend in the studio trying to fix America track-by-track because your b*tch ass couldn’t be bothered to do the right thing and stop a neo-fascist from walking into the goddamn Oval Office, you’re ripping them away from precious time spent with their children.

“Mom, where’s Dad?”
“In the studio, trying to fend off the revival of the fucking KKK because almost half of all registered voters didn’t head for the polls like good, patriotic samaritans to stop them .”
“When will he be home?”
“Oh, kid, he’s never coming home- he’ll be touring endlessly at this point.”

Shame on you. Shame on the whole f*cking lot of you.

“No Trump! No KKK! No Fascist USA!”

12. Anti-Flag

aflag3

Oh, are you all F*CKING KIDDING ME? You managed to completely and utterly enrage every member of Anti-Flag to the point where they’re printing custom MERCH about this God-Forsaken Reprehensible Walking Conglomerate of Used Diapers That’s Been Molded Into the Form of Hitler Himself “President-Elect.” And you know what that means, right? It means that we’re going to get ANOTHER f*cking album from them. And I’m gonna have to take the time to sit there, grit my teeth, and honestly review it.

What, was For Blood And Empire not clear enough for you all?! Was their 33-album (including Splits, EPs, Live Sets, and more) discography just NOT FUCKING GOOD ENOUGH?! You really needed ONE MORE?!?!

Damn you; damn you all to Hell.

aflag

 

13. Queen.

Image result for queen

Oh, for crying out f- No. No. You know what? You all managed to piss off Queen. You pissed them off when you showed up at a Trump rally and sang along to their unauthorized use of “We Are the Champions.” You pissed off lead guitarist Brian May to the point where he wrote on his website, “My personal reaction to Donald Trump using our music? We’d never give permission. We are taking advice on what steps we can take to ensure this use does not continue… I will make sure we take what steps we can to dissociate ourselves from Donald Trump’s unsavoury campaign.” And you pissed them off when you voted for Donald anyways.

Like, was that not enough of a final warning sign?! FRIGGIN’ QUEEN DIDN’T EVEN LIKE HIM.

What a friggin’ disgrace. Freddie Mercury would be ASHAMED. BAFFLED.

I’m f*cking done. Y’all have made me so unbelievably sad.

No, you don’t get any end-of-post music. You lost that right.

 

Leave a comment